Lesson #1

Your orientation to the Seven Dimensions of Relating Foundation Course

This course introduces the skills and understandings, the absence of which have made all our relationships much more difficult than they need to be.  Feeling relaxed and at ease with other people is meant to be our most natural condition.  This is about learning what is most natural to us.

Lesson #2

The Unavoidable Influence of Our Fathers

Whoever your father was or wasn’t, he had a deep influence on your style of relating.  It is possible for a man to move beyond the limitations he inadvertently picked up from the men around him as he was growing up.

Lesson #3

Curiosity is the First Dimension

Curiosity was pretty much flattened out and discouraged for most of us around the age of 6.  Curiosity is the fundamental faculty of imagination and intelligence.  The language of curiosity is questions.  All of a person’s relating experiences are a function of the questions he asks.  Always.  Why doesn’t a person hear another person?  Why does a date fall flat?  Why do relationships grow stale?  Curiosity has gone flat.  Being curious is all about becoming a student of how to ask better questions.

Lesson #4

Breathing–the Second Dimension

How is your breathing like your relationships?  Deep and rich or shallow and automatic?  In this lesson, you will learn a breathing technique that will immediately deepen all your interactions and make you more patient and attentive to the people who are most important to you.

Lesson #5

Energy is the Third Dimension

This lesson is about being able to distinguish between what you are thinking and what you are feeling in your body.  The English language has betrayed us because it confuses thoughts and feelings.  Big difference!  Apples and oranges. Right here is where a lot of men get screwed because they can’t answer feeling questions such as  “What do you feel?: or “What are you feeling about that?” Never again do you need to be at a loss for how to answer questions about feelings!

Lesson #6

Intention is the Fourth Dimension

What do you want out of this conversation?  All the communicating skills in the world cannot overcome the invisible, largely unconscious, agenda or direction you have.  In fact, most people are totally unaware of how what is going on inside them is creating havoc in their interactions with the people they interact with, especially in charged situations.

Lesson #7

The Diamond of Self-Awareness and the Strong Foundation of the First Four Dimension

This lesson reviews the first four dimensions and points out how they interact and compliment one another to create a powerful new confidence in who you are bringing to all your relationships.

Lesson #8

Secrets for Creating Terrible Relationships–Misunderstanding Love, Part 1

This is the first in the How to Create Terrible Relationships series which I am including in the Foundation Course.  There are lessons which help men avoid getting blindsided in their closest relationships.

Not understanding how love really works, where it comes from and where it goes destroys more intimate relationships than any other single factor that I have come across in my entire career.

Hint:  the source of your experience does not come from someone else.

Lesson #9  Secrets for Creating Terrible Relationships–Misunderstanding Love Part 2

Truth is the most powerful aphrodisiac.

Love is a bodily felt experience.  The extent to which you are telling yourself the truth about your life, is the extent to which you feel the liberating rush of life in your body.

Pretending doesn’t work even when it’s between you and you.

Lesson #10  The Art of Relating is All Improvisation

Whose line is this anyway?  Do you remember the improv show on TV?  Yes, they made everything up; but they practice making stuff up.

Your interactions with other people are only as rich as your ability to make stuff up.

Practice asking questions.  Practice breathing while you are listening.  Practice noticing the thoughts that are buzzing between your ears.